Once More With Feelin'
by Vampbarbie
Summary: Quiet at the back or you'll be heading for the special hell. A Firefly Musical. A bit of angst, lots of humour, song and fluff. What more could you want?
1. The Opening Number

Ladies and gentlemen please take your seats for the opening night of 'Once More With Feelin' '. Please do not talk or you will be going to the special hell.

Here it is - the Firefly Musical. I own no FF stuff and all the music / lyrics / songs are by The Eagles.

Anything in italics is sung. The songs may not seem completely in character but it was a case of making them fit. Spacing is also sometimes a bit erratic due to the somg lines.

Its a bit of angst, a bit of action but lots of fluff and lots of song.

I have no hope of this ever happening because, well I've heard Nathan Fillion and Alan Tudyk try and sing the theme song and well...

Please enjoy and review. I apologise for huge number of chapters but thats mostly so it makes sense.

The Opening Number: Take It Easy

The cargo bay. Mal is centre stage on the catwalk. Jayne is pumping iron down below, with Book spotting him and with River watching Jayne intently. Simon has just entered at the bottom of the cargo bay, a pad of medical notes in his hand. Inara is on the top catwalk looking down, observing everything. Kaylee is sitting on the stairs polishing an engine part. Zoë is on the stairs near Mal, and Wash has just entered from the bridge.

Mal starts to sing as he surveys his crew.

_"Well, I'm a runnin' down the road, tryin' to loosen my load,  
I've got seven women on my mind:  
four that wanna own me, two that wanna stone me,  
one says she's a friend of mine.  
Take it easy, take it easy,  
don't let the sound of your own wheels drive you crazy."_

River sways a little and sings at Jayne. _"Lighten up while you still can, don't even try to understand,  
just find a place to make your stand and take it easy."_

Jayne continues to pump iron and sings as though it's a normal occurrence.

_"Well, I'm a standin' on a corner in Winslow, Arizona  
and such a fine sight to see:  
it's a girl, my Lord, in a flat bed Ford  
slowin' down to take a look at me.  
Come on, baby, don't say maybe.  
I gotta know if your sweet love is gonna save me."_

_"We may lose and we may win though we will never be here again."_ Wash sings up to Mal as though it's a command.

"_So open up, I'm climbin' in, so take it easy_." Jayne finishes his verse, managing to sound as crude as possible.

"_Well, I'm a runnin' down the road, tryin' to loosen my load, got a world of trouble on my mind.  
Lookin' for a lover who won't blow my cover,  
she's so hard to find."_ Simon sings as he crosses the cargo bay, still pretending to read the report in his hand but eying Kaylee.

"_Take it easy, take it easy, don't let the sound of your own wheels drive you crazy."_ Zoë sings to Mal, who gives her a stare.

Kaylee looks at Simon just as he has looked away and sings, "_Come on, baby, don't say maybe.  
I gotta know if your sweet love is gonna save me."_

The entire crew, including Inara and Book sing together for the end of the opening number. "_Oh, we got it easy,  
we oughta take it easy."_

Then as if the song never happened they continue the daily life of Serenity.


	2. When the fat lady sings

Those Shoes

Inara carries her bag to the top of the ramp, and hugs Kaylee then River. Both are crying.

"Bye 'Nara," Kaylee says. "Can't believe you're leaving Serenity. Wasn't she good enough for you?"

"No Kaylee. Its not that…its just…" she cuts off as Mal enters on a high catwalk, his face black as thunder.

Simon holds out a hand in a 'proper' handshake. Inara ignores it, and kisses him soundly on both cheeks. He looks embarrassed but flattered. "Goodbye Inara."

Zoë and Wash say their goodbyes quietly. Jayne just nods. He and Inara never quite saw eye to eye.

Mal walks down the stairs and everybody disappears as if by magic. The intro music starts. He looks at Inara.

"Leaving then?"

"Yes. Goodbye Mal. Least now you won't have the inconvenience of my work on your boat."

"Yeah, you can whore all you want in peace."

She shoots him a cold hard look. Mal starts to sing, throwing the words at her like insults.

"_Tell us what you're gonna do tonight, mama.  
There must be someplace you can go  
In the middle of the tall drinks and the drama;  
there must be someone you know._

_God knows, you're lookin' good enough,  
but you're so smooth and the world's so rough.  
You might have somethin' to loose.  
Oh, no, pretty mama, what you gonna  
do in those shoes?"_

Mal circles her, and leans over her shoulder to sing in her ear.

"_Got those pretty little straps around your ankles  
Got those shiny little chains around your heart.  
You go to have your independence  
but you don't know just where to start._

_Desperation in the singles bars  
an' all those jerkoffs in their fancy cars.  
you can't believe your reviews._

_Oh, no, you can't do that,  
once you started wearin' those shoes._"

Mal faces her again, his eyes are hard and Inara looks angry.

"You're a liu kou shui de biaozi he houzi de erzi."

"Language Companion. You'll never be a lady with a mouth like that."

"_They're lookin' at you, leanin' on you  
Tell you anything you want to hear  
They give you tablets of love  
They're waiting for you  
got to score you  
handy with a shovel and so sincere  
Ooh, they got the kid glove_

_You just want someone to talk to  
They just wanna get their hands on you  
You get whatever you choose  
Oh, no, you can't do that,  
Once you started wearin' those shoes._"

"Goodbye Captain." Inara raises her chin and gives him a steady look. She starts to sing another song.

Already Gone

"_Well, I heard some people talkin' just the other day  
And they said you were gonna put me on a shelf  
But let me tell you I got some news for you  
And you'll soon find out it's true  
And then you'll have to eat your lunch all by yourself  
'Cause I'm already gone  
And I'm feelin' strong  
I will sing this vict'ry song, woo, hoo, hoo, woo, hoo, hoo"_

Inara gives him a grim smile that only seems to infuriate him more.

"_The letter that you wrote me made me stop and wonder why  
But I guess you felt like you had to set things right  
Just remember this, my boy, when you look up in the sky  
You can see the stars and still not see the light (that's right)._

_And I'm already gone  
And I'm feelin' strong  
I will sing this vict'ry song, woo, hoo, hoo, woo, hoo, hoo"_

Mal opens his mouth to interrupt but she cuts him off with,

"_Well I know it wasn't you who held me down  
Heaven knows it wasn't you who set me free  
So often times it happens that we live our lives in chains  
And we never even know we have the key._

_But me, I'm already gone  
And I'm feelin' strong  
I will sing this vict'ry song  
'Cause I'm already gone  
Yes, I'm already gone  
And I'm feelin' strong  
I will sing this vict'ry song  
'Cause I'm already gone  
Yes, I'm already gone  
Already gone  
All right, nighty-night."_

She picks up her bag and leaves without a backward glance.

"Bah!" Mal growls. "Good riddance."

Wasted Time

River ghosts across an upper catwalk and watches Mal. She starts to sing.

"_Well baby, there you stand  
With your little head, down in your hand  
Oh, my God, you can't believe  
Its happening again  
your baby's gone, and you're all alone  
and it looks like the end. _

And you're back out on the street.  
And you're tryin' to remember.  
How will you start it over?  
You don't know if you can.  
You don't care much for a stranger's touch,  
but you can't hold your man.

You never thought you'd be alone  
this far down the line  
And I know what's been on your mind  
You're afraid it's all been wasted time

The autumn leaves have got you thinking  
about the first time that you fell  
You didn't love the boy too much, no, no  
you just loved the boy too well, farewell  
So you live from day to day, and you dream  
about tomorrow, oh.

And the hours go by like minutes  
and the shadows come to stay  
So you take a little something  
to make them go away  
And I could have done so many things, baby  
If I could only stop my mind from wonderin' what  
I left behind and from worrying 'bout this wasted time

Ooh, another love has come and gone  
Ooh, and the years keep rushing on  
I remember what you told me  
before you went out on your own:  
"Sometimes to keep it together,  
you got to leave it alone."

So you can get on with your search, baby,  
and I can get on with mine  
And maybe someday we will find,  
that it wasn't really wasted time  
Mm, hm  
Oh hoo, ooh, ohh,  
Ooh, ooh, mm"

* * *

Translation notes

Liu kou shui de biaozi he houzi de erzi: son of a drooling whore and a monkey (not very Inara-ish but such a good line)


	3. Aria

Take it to the Limit

Slowly the table empties as they clear up after a strained late evening meal, where no one has mentioned Inara. Wash throws Zoë a very meaningful look and they leave as quickly as possible. Kaylee is washing up. Jayne is eating the very last scraps of food from the serving dish, before he belches loudly and leaves the room without a word. River scampers after him, calling out, "Jayne is a greedy girl."

Jayne can be heard snapping, "Say that again girl and I'll have to prove to you I ain't."

Book carries the last serving dish to the sink for Kaylee and then excuses himself, politely. Soon moans are heard from Wash and Zoë's room.

Simon is fussing around the kitchen, hindering more than helping Kaylee. Mal is sat at the table his chin resting on his hand.

Kaylee finishes, and goes to Mal. She kisses him lightly on the cheek, "G'night Cap'n."

"Night Kaylee."

"I'll…I'm just going to walk Kaylee back to her room," Simon splutters and darts after her.

"Doc, you don't have to…walk…her…" Mal trails off when he realises Simon has already gone.

The lights fade down until Mal is sat in a single spotlight at the table. He looks depressed.

"_All alone at the end of the of the evening  
And the bright lights have faded to blue  
I was thinking 'bout a woman who might have  
Loved me and I never knew  
You know I've always been a dreamer_"

The rest of the crew start singing backing vocals from offstage (in brackets)

"_(spent my life running 'round)  
And it's so hard to change  
(Can't seem to settle down)  
But the dreams I've seen lately  
Keep on turning out and burning out  
And turning out the same  
So put me on a highway  
And show me a sign  
And take it to the limit one more time  
You can spend all your time making money  
You can spend all your love making time"_

Mal looks around at his ship.

"_If it all fell to pieces tomorrow  
Would you still be mine?  
And when you're looking for your freedom  
(Nobody seems to care)  
And you can't find the door  
(Can't find it anywhere)  
When there's nothing to believe in  
Still you're coming back, you're running back, you're coming back  
for more  
So put me on a highway  
And show me a sign  
And take it to the limit one more time  
Take it to the limit  
Take it to the limit  
Take it to the limit one more time" _

Mal stands lies his head on the table and then blackout.

* * *

New Kid in Town

Inara walks into the guild house on Persephone and greets a few Companions. She keeps her fixed smile on her face, but there's a fear in her eyes as she sings,

"_There's talk on the street, it sounds so familiar.  
Great expectations, everybody's watching you.  
People you meet they all seem to know you,  
even your old friends treat you like you're something new.  
Johnny-come-lately, the new kid in town,  
everybody loves you, so don't let them down.  
You look in her eyes, the music begins to play.  
Hopeless romantics, here we go again.  
But after a while you're looking the other way.  
It's those restless hearts that never mend.  
Johnny-come-lately, the new kid in town,  
will she still love you when you're not around?"_

Inara walks towards a grand flight of stairs and we see the other Companions exchange looks and whisper.

"_There's so many things you should have told her  
but night after night you're willing to hold her,  
just hold her tears on your shoulder.  
There's talk on the street, it's there to remind you  
that it doesn't really matter which side you're on.  
You're walking away and they're talking behind you.  
They will never forget you till somebody new comes along.  
Where you been lately? There's a new kid in town.  
Everybody loves him, don't they? Now he's holding her  
and you're still around, oh my my.  
There's a new kid in town,  
just another new kid in town.  
Oo-hoo, everybody's talking 'bout the new kid in town.  
Oo-hoo, everybody's walking like the new kid in town.  
There's a new kid in town. I don't want to hear it  
There's a new kid in town. I don't want to hear it  
There's a new kid in town.  
There's a new kid in town.  
There's a new kid in town. Everybody's talking  
There's a new kid in town. People started walking  
There's a new kid in town.  
There's a new kid in town."_

"What have I done?" she whispers to herself.


	4. Chorus

I Can't Tell You Why

Simon watches Kaylee doing something to Serenity's engine. He's standing in the doorway and she keeps working without noticing him singing.

"_Look at us baby, up all night  
Tearing our love apart  
Aren't we the same two people who live  
through years in the dark?  
Ahh...  
Every time I try to walk away  
Something makes me turn around and stay  
And I can't tell you why"_

He runs a hand over his face. Kaylee does likewise but smears grease across her nose.

"_When we get crazy,  
it just ain't to right,  
(try to keep you head, little girl)  
Girl, I get lonely, too  
You don't have to worry  
Just hold on tight  
(don't get caught in your little world)  
'Cause I love you  
Nothing's wrong as far as I can see  
We make it harder than it has to be  
and I can't tell you why  
no, baby, I can't tell you why  
I can't tell you why  
No, no, baby, I can't tell you why  
I can't tell you why  
I can't tell you why"_

He walks away without speaking to her. Kaylee looks up but he has already gone.

On The Border

Wash is in his piloting chair, looking calm cool and totally in control. He starts to hum to himself and then starts to sing.

"_Cruisin' down the centre of a two way street  
Wond'rin' who is really in the driver's seat  
Mindin' my bus'ness along comes big brother  
Says, "Son, you better get on one side or the other."_

I'm out on the border, I'm walkin' the line  
Don't you tell me 'bout your law and order  
I'm try'n' to change this water to wine.

After a hard day, I'm safe at home  
Foolin' with my baby on the telephone  
Out of nowhere somebody cuts in and  
Says, "Hmm, you in some trouble boy, we know where you're been."

I'm out on the border  
I thought this was a private line  
Don't you tell me 'bout your law and order  
I'm try'n' to change this water to wine"

He turns to his dinos and sings to them.

"_Never mind your name, just give us your number, mm  
Never mind your face, just show us your card, mm  
And we wanna know whose wing are you under  
You better step to the right or we can make it hard_

I'm stuck on the border  
All I wanted was some peace of mind  
Don't you tell me 'bout your law and order  
I'm try'n' to change this water to wine

On the border  
On the border  
On the border  
On the border  
On the border  
Leave me be , I'm just walkin' this line  
On the border  
On the border  
All I wanted was some peace of mind, peace of mind  
I'm out on the border  
On the border  
Can't you see I'm tryin to change this water to wine  
Don't you tell me 'bout your law and order  
Sick and tired of all your law and order  
Sick and tired of it" 

Jayne's head pokes through the door. "You really are a strange little man…"

End Scene.


	5. Losing the note

Hole in the World

Simon and Book and Jayne are trying to play poker at the dining table, but it's a strained game, and isn't really getting anywhere. Simon stares at his cards and starts singing.

"_There's a hole in the world tonight.  
There's a Cloud of fear and sorrow.  
There's a hole in the world tonight.  
Don't let there be a hole in the world tomorrow._  
_  
They say that anger is just love  
disappointed.  
They say that love is just a state of mind,  
but all this  
fighting over who is anointed.  
Oh how can people be so blind"_

Book picks up the song. "_There's a hole in the world tonight.  
There's a Cloud of fear and sorrow.  
There's a hole in the world tonight.  
Don't let there be a hole in the world tomorrow. _

Oh they tell me there's a place over yonder,  
Cool water running through the burning sand,  
Until we learn to love one another

_We will never reach the promise land._"

Jayne throws his cards onto the table, obviously annoyed with his hand. He joins in with the chorus with Simon and Book.

"_There's a hole in the world tonight.  
There's a Cloud of fear and sorrow.  
There's a hole in the world tonight.  
Don't let there be a hole in the world tomorrow_."

Jayne sings this chorus alone with no music, simultaneously with Simon singing the verse.

"_There's a hole in the world tonight.  
There's a Cloud of fear and sorrow.  
There's a hole in the world tonight.  
Don't let there be a hole in the world tomorrow." / "They say that anger is just love  
disappointed.  
They say that love is just a state of mind,  
but all this  
fighting over who is anointed.  
Oh how can people be so blind.?"_

The others rejoin in to fade.

"_There's a hole in the world tonight.  
There's a Cloud of fear and sorrow.  
There's a hole in the world tonight.  
Don't let there be a hole in the world tomorrow._

_There's a hole in the world tonight.  
There's a Cloud of fear and sorrow.  
There's a hole in the world tonight.  
Don't let there be a hole in the world tomorrow."_

"Well I'm done," Jayne stands up, turns and finds River standing in the doorway. "Gorramit doc, stop your crazy sister stalking me!"

He barges past River._  
_

Desperado

River is following Jayne from the dining room after the game of cards. They are alone in the corridor. She starts to sing at his back.

"_Desperado, why don't you come to your senses?  
You been out ridin' fences for so long now.  
Oh you're a hard one,  
But I know that you've got your reasons,  
These things that are pleasin' you,  
Can hurt you somehow."_

Jayne turns and glares at her. He opens his mouth to speak but she cuts him off.

"_Don't you draw the queen of diamonds boy,  
She'll beat you if she's able,  
The queen of hearts is always your best bet,  
Now it seems to me some fine things  
Have been laid upon you table,  
But you only want the ones that you can't get._

_Desperado, oh you ain't gettin' no younger,  
Your pain and your hunger they're drivin' you home,  
And freedom, well that's just some people talkin',  
Your prison is walkin' through this world all alone."_

"Gorram crazy girl singing at me now…" Jayne mutters, turning away again. He starts to walk away. River gets louder.

"_Don't your feet get cold in the wintertime?  
The sky won't snow and the sun won't shine,  
It's hard to tell the night time from the day.  
You're losing all your highs and lows,  
Ain't it funny how the feelin' goes away?_

_Desperado, why don't you come to your senses?  
Come down from your fences, open the gate.  
It may be rainin',  
But there's a rainbow above you,  
You gotta let somebody love you, (Let somebody love you)  
You better let somebody love you,  
Before it's too late."_

Jayne's back stiffens, and we hear him mutter to himself. "Ain't too gorram late. Plenty of people to love…"

End scene.


	6. Job 1: Cows vs Beagles

"I thought we were getting beagles…Mal? Mal when do we get to smuggle beagles?" Wash stares at the cows as they mill around the cargo bay.

Mal throws him a glare. "If I say we smuggle cattle then that's what we smuggle dong ma?"

Wash rolls his eyes, and heads back to the bridge. He brushes past Zoë. "He's a right grumpy git today."

Zoë just gives her husband a look.

* * *

Tequila Sunrise

Mal is leaning heavily on the fence of the cattle pen surveying the land. His face is turned to the last dying rays of the sun. No one else dares to approach him. The look on his face is one of loneliness and despair. Book stands on Serenity's ramp and watches him. He starts to sing; all the while Mal watches the sunset, oblivious.

"_Its another Tequila Sunrise,  
stirring slowly cross the sky,  
said good bye._

_He was just a hired hand,  
working on the dreams he'd planned to try,  
the days go by.Ev'ry night when the sun go down,  
just another lonely boy in town.  
And she's out runnin' 'round._

_She wasn't just another woman,  
and I couldn't keep from comin' on.  
It's been so long._

_Whoa, and it's a hollow feeling when it comes down to dealing friends  
it never endsTake another shot of courage,  
wonder why the right words never come  
you just get numb._

_It's another Tequila Sunrise  
this is old world still looks the same,  
another frame._

_Hmm."_

Mal turns and passes Book as he heads back onto his ship.

"Oughta get to bed soon Preacher. Big job tomorrow," he says before vanishing.

* * *

Heartache Tonight

The crew are in a bar, job finished, sitting around a table. Mal is obviously drunk and the others are exchanging significant glances. Kaylee and Zoë look at each other, and then they sing together.

"_Somebody's gonna hurt someone  
before the night is through  
Somebody's gonna come undone.  
There's nothin' we can do.  
Everybody wants to touch somebody  
if it takes all night.  
Everybody wants to take a little chance,  
Make it come out right."_

"_There's gonna be a heartache tonight,  
a heartache tonight, I know.  
There's gonna be a heartache tonight, I know.  
Lord, I know." _Jayne sings the verse, and throws a sly glance at River.

"_Some people like to stay out late  
Some folks can't hold out that long  
But nobody wants to go home now.  
There's too much goin' on._" Mal sings drunkenly, lifting his glass high. "_This night is gonna last forever.  
Last all, last all summer long.  
Some time before the sun comes up  
The radio is gonna play that song."_

_"There's gonna be a heartache tonight,  
A heartache tonight, I know.  
There's gonna be a heartache tonight,  
A heartache tonight, I know.  
Lord I know." _Book looks at them all in obvious despair.

"_There's gonna be a heartache tonight,  
the moon's shinin' bright  
so turn out the light, and we'll get it right.  
There's gonna be a heartache tonight, a  
heartache tonight I know.  
Heartache baby," _Kaylee looks at Simon with obvious lust.

"_Somebody's gonna hurt someone, (somebody)  
Before the night is through  
Somebody's gonna come undone,  
There's nothin' we can do  
(Everybody) Everybody wants to touch somebody  
if it takes all night  
Everybody wants to take a little chance  
To make it come out right _

There's gonna be a heartache tonight  
A heartache tonight, I know  
There's gonna be a heartache tonight,  
A heartache tonight, I know  
Let's go.  
We can beat around the bushes;  
we can get down to the bone  
We can leave it in the parkin' lot,  
but either way, there's gonna be a  
heartache tonight, a heartache tonight I know.  
There'll be a heartache tonight  
a heartache tonight I know."

They all sing in harmony looking at each other uneasily. Simon catches a particularly intense glance of Kaylee's and blushes furiously. River stares unabashedly at Jayne, who tries to glare at her. Zoë is trying to get Mal to stand, while Wash doesn't look happy at the way Mal is falling over his wife. Finally they manage to haul Mal to his feet and leave the bar.


	7. Core Song

The crew are sat round the dining table, except for River and Book.

"The Core?" Wash looks aghast. Even Zoë looks pretty confused.

"We can't!" Simon stares at him and is oblivious to Kaylee's hand on his arm.

"You'll do as I say or you can get off my gorram boat," Mal growls at him.

"Dang ran," Simon snaps back. "Can't mess up the job."

He stomps from the room. Kaylee sits there staring hard at the table.

Jayne folds his arms. "Sounds like suicide."

"Come on Wash," Zoë says to him, "Looks like the Captain has to plan his major crime in peace. Excuse us…sir."

Mal is left sitting at the table. He thumps it with his fist and swears under his breath. "Ni ta ma de! Tian xia shuo yu de ren dou gaisi!"

* * *

Seven Bridges Road

Later Kaylee is preparing dinner alone and singing as Mal enters. She gives him a dazzling smile. No one else is talking to him.

"_There are stars in the southern sky  
Southward as you go.  
There is moonlight and moss in the trees  
Down the Seven Bridges Road."_

Mal can't resist joining in. Only Kaylee can shake him from his funk.

"_Now I have loved you like a baby...  
Like some lonesome child,  
And I have loved you in a tame way,  
And I have loved you wild.  
Sometimes there's a part of me  
Has to turn from here and go...  
Running like a child from these warm stars  
Down the Seven Bridges Road.  
There are stars in the southern sky.  
And if ever you decide you should go._

_There is a taste of time, sweet and honey_

_Down the seven bridges road."_

* * *

Translation Notes:

Dang ran: of course

Ni ta ma de! Tian xia shuo yu de ren dou gaisi! - Motherhumper! Everyone in the universe should die!


	8. Head for Heights

Witchy Woman

Jayne is working out in the cargo bay and knows she's watching him. Gorram girl is crazier than ever. Jobs in the core weren't helping her mental state. And Mal's recent change to dictatorship wasn't going to improve matters.

River is standing on the lowest rail of the catwalk right above him and leaning over, her long hair hanging.

Jayne sits up, and grabs a towel. The instrumental starts, as he stands up and walks up the stairs to her. He stops a few feet away.

"Birds fly this high Jayne. Have you got a head for heights?" River asks, spinning daintily on the rail so her other foot rests across the walk way on the other rail, and she's facing him.

Jayne starts to sing at her, slowly walking forwards.

"_Raven hair and ruby lips  
sparks fly from her finger tips  
Echoed voices in the night  
she's a restless spirit on an endless flight  
wooo hooo witchy woman, see how  
high she flies  
woo hoo witchy woman she got  
the moon in her eye  
She held me spellbound in the night  
dancing shadows and firelight  
crazy laughter in another  
room and she drove herself to madness  
with a silver spoon  
woo hoo witchy woman see how high she flies  
woo hoo witchy woman she got the moon in her eye  
Well I know you want a lover,  
let me tell your brother, she's been sleeping  
in the Devil's bed.  
And there's some rumours going round  
someone's underground  
she can rock you in the night time  
'til your skin turns red  
woo hoo witchy woman  
see how high she flies  
woo hoo witchy woman  
she got the moon in her eyes"_

River jumps down, presses herself against Jayne, and he, who has heard of the 'special hell' just as much as Mal, mutters, "Gee this is special," as he kisses her.

Life in the Fast Lane

Zoë catches sight of River and Jayne up on the catwalk. She frowns at them and glances around to see if Simon or Mal has seen this yet.

"_He was a hard-headed man  
He was brutally handsome, and she was terminally pretty  
She held him up, and he held her for ransom in the heart  
of the cold, cold city  
He had a nasty reputation as a cruel dude  
They said he was ruthless, they said he was crude  
They had one thing in common, they were  
good in bed  
She'd say, 'Faster, faster. The lights are turnin' red."  
Life in the fast lane  
Surely make you lose your mind, mm  
Are you with me so far?_

_Eager for action and hot for the game  
The coming attraction, the drop of a name  
They knew all the right people, they took  
all the right pills  
They threw outrageous parties, they paid heavily bills.  
There were lines on the mirror, lines on her face  
She pretended not to notice, she was caught up  
in the race_

_Out every evening, until it was light  
He was too tired to make it, she was too tired  
to fight about it_

_Life in the fast lane  
Surely make you lose your mind  
Life in the fast lane, everything all the time  
Life in the fast lane, uh huh  
Blowin' and burnin', blinded by thirst  
They didn't see the stop sign,  
took a turn for the worst._

_She said, "Listen, baby. You can hear the engine  
ring. We've been up and down this highway;  
haven't seen a goddamn thing."  
He said, "Call the doctor. I think I'm gonna crash."  
"The doctor say he's comin', but you gotta pay him cash."  
They went rushin' down that freeway, messed around  
and got lost  
They didn't care they were just dyin' to get off  
And it was life in the fast lane  
Life in the fast lane"_

Zoë finally settles on pretending she hasn't seen anything but yells, "Jayne! You in here?"

Jayne's head appears over the railing, he looks flustered. "What?" he growls irritably.

Blackout.


	9. Job 2: Ariel song

Peaceful Easy Feeling

Wash and Zoë are lying in bed. Wash props himself up on one elbow and looks at his wife.

"I don't want you to go today."

"Why? I'll be with Mal…"

"That's what worries me. He's getting reckless Zoë. Jobs in the Core? You know we don't do that. Promise me you'll be careful."

"I promise." She grins wickedly at him.

Wash starts to sing to her.

"_I like the way your sparkling earrings lay,  
against your skin, so brown  
and I wanna sleep with you  
in the desert tonight  
with a billion stars all around  
'cause I gotta peaceful easy feeling  
and I know you won't let me down  
'cause I'm already standing on the ground  
And I found out a long time ago  
what a woman can do to your soul  
Ah, but she can't take you anyway  
You don't already know how to go  
and I gotta peaceful, easy feeling  
and I know you won't let me down  
'cause I'm already standing on the ground  
I get this feeling I may know you  
as a lover and a friend  
but this voice keeps whispering  
in my other ear, tells me  
I may never see you again  
'cause I get a peaceful, easy feeling  
and I know you won't let me down  
'cause I'm already standing on the ground  
'cause I'm already standing...  
on the ground  
oooo, oooo."_

Zoë grabs him and kisses him passionately. Blackout.

* * *

Mal glares at the siblings. "That's it! Get off my gorram boat!"

"What?" Simon looks horrified.

"Go for a walk. Get some food. Shop for all I gorram care! Just get out of my sight for an hour or two. Don't get into trouble. Dong ma? Out, Out now! OUT!"

* * *

The Sad Café

Simon and River are walking through the back streets of Ariel, keeping to quiet empty roads and trying to look inconspicuous. Simon is wearing clothes more suited to Mal, tight pants and a beige shirt, the collar open with suspenders, and River has on a long black skirt and bluey-purple blouse of Inara's. Her hair is piled up onto of her head.

River takes Simon's arm and grins at him.

"Remember when we used to live like this?" River said her eyes gleaming. "Free, easy…"

Simon nods.

"We used to go out Simon. No hiding then."

Simon ssshh's her, but she starts to sing.

"_Out in the shiny night the rain was softly falling  
The tracks that ran down the boulevard  
had all been washed away  
Out of the silver light the past came softly calling  
And I remembered the times we spent  
Inside the Sad Café.  
Oh, it seemed like a holy place  
Protected by amazing grace  
And we would sing right out loud  
The things we could not say  
We thought we could change this world  
With words like "love" and "freedom"  
We were part of the lonely crowd  
Inside the Sad Café"_

River gets hold of his hands and makes him dance with her. He finally smiles and sings to her.

"_Oh, expecting to fly  
We would meet on that beautiful shore  
in the sweet by and by  
Some of their dreams came true  
Some just passed away  
And some of them stayed behind  
Inside the Sad Café"_

Simon turns River in a perfect pirouette, and she sings back to him.

"_The clouds rolled in and hid that shore  
now that Glory Train,_

_it don't stop here no more"_

Simon puts a finger on her lips, and twirls her closer to him with a brotherly smile. They dance together. Just being two people without a care in the world.

"_Now I look at the years gone by  
And wonder at the powers that be  
I don't know why fortune smiles on some  
And lets the rest go free"_

River puts her head on his shoulder, and sings very quietly against it.

"_Maybe the time has drawn the faces I recall  
But things in this life change very slowly_

_If they ever change at all  
There's no use in asking why  
It just turned out that way  
So meet me at midnight, baby  
Inside the Sad Cafe  
Why don't you meet me at midnight, baby  
Inside the Sad Café"_

Simon steps away and bows theatrically to River. "Thank you for the dance mei mei."

In the next second someone steps from the shadows, and bodily picks River off her feet. She screams, as three more men leap on Simon. The man holding her covers her mouth with his hand. Simon struggles and manages to hit out at one. Two of the men grab his arms and the third punches him in the face. Simon spits blood out, as a second punch hits him in the solar plexus. He sags, winded in the men's arms. The man's laughs and punches him round the head. The men drop him and leave him lying in the gutter. River keeps screaming through the man's hand.

End scene.


	10. Losing the script

In The City

Simon spits out a mouthful of dirt, rolls over and stands up. He leans against a wall and rubs his face. He's filthy from the gutter and there's a trickle of blood on his chin.

"Oh God River…I'm so sorry."

He stands there his head hung low for a long moment. You can hear the desperation, longing and fear in his voice.

"_Somewhere out there on that horizon  
Out beyond the neon lights  
I know there must be somethin' better  
but there's nowhere else in sight  
It's survival in the city  
When you live from day to day  
City streets don't have much pity  
When you're down, that's where you'll stay  
In the city, oh, oh.  
In the city"_

Cut to a shot of Mal, leaning against a wall in the exact same pose as Simon, but he's in a bar and looking up, surveying Zoë and Jayne complete the deal. He smiles grimly to himself.When he sings, its confidant and calm. Typical Mal at work.

"_I was born here in the city  
With my back against the wall  
Nothing grows, and life ain't very pretty  
No one's there to catch you when you fall  
Somewhere out on that horizon  
Faraway from the neon sky  
I know there must be somethin' better  
And I can't stay another night  
In the city, oh, oh.  
In the city"_

End scene.

* * *

Love Will Keep Us Alive

Kaylee is sat in a folding chair on Serenity's ramp, happily twirling her parasol. Simon staggers into the scene and she stands staring at him in horror. Kaylee pulls Simon towards her, a cry of alarm catching on her lips.

"Simon? What happened?" she puts her hands on his shoulders.

He raises his head, and looks at her, clinging to her arms. His shirt collar is open and his vest half undone. His hair is messy and a bruise is forming on his cheek. He is covered in dirt.

"They took her. They took River…" it comes tumbling out of his mouth and he looks devastated.

Kaylee puts her arms around him, and just holds him for a long moment. "It'll be alright. Mal will…I've got you. I've always got you."

Simon looks up at her and then steps away as though suddenly realising that clinging to her isn't 'proper'. She starts to sing to him.

"_I was standing  
All alone against the world outside  
You were searching  
For a place to hide."_

She looks at him hopefully, then he sings back to her.

"_Lost and lonely  
Now you've given me the will to survive  
When we're hungry...love will keep us alive _

_Don't you worry  
Sometimes you've just gotta let it ride  
The world is changing  
Right before your eyes  
Now I've found you  
There's no more emptiness inside  
When we're hungry...love will keep us alive" _

"_I would die for you  
Climb the highest mountain  
Baby, there's nothing I wouldn't do," _Kaylee sings sweetly to him, taking his hand.

"_There's no more emptiness inside  
When we're hungry...love will keep us alive" _Simon gives her a watery smile,_ "I would die for you  
Climb the highest mountain  
Baby, there's nothing I wouldn't do." _

Simon carefully puts his arms around her and they dance on Serenity's ramp to the instrumental interlude. She rests her head against him. Simon closes his eyes. Kaylee finally steps out of the dance, holding both of his hands.

"_I would die for you  
Climb the highest mountain  
Baby, there's nothing I wouldn't do. _

_I was standing  
All alone against the world outside  
You were searching  
For a place to hide_

_Lost and lonely" _

Simon finishes the line,_ "Now you've given me the will to survive _

_When we're hungry...love will keep us alive"_

They sing the final two lines together staring into each other's eyes._ "When we're hungry...love will keep us alive  
When we're hungry...love will keep us alive"_

They look at each other for a beat then they lean together and kiss deeply.

Black out

* * *

Get Over It

A warehouse. Somewhere on Ariel.

Simon is holding River like she is the most precious thing in the world. The bruise on his cheek is now dark purple.

"We're just doing our jobs!" The four men on their knees in front of Mal, Jayne and Zoë's big guns cry.

The three of them exchange looks.

"_I turn on the tube what do I see,  
a whole lot a people cryin' "don't blame me"  
they point their crooked little fingers at everybody else  
spend all their time feelin' sorry for themselves  
victim of this, victim of that  
your mommas too thin; and your daddy's too fat_

_Get over it  
get over it  
all this whinin' and cryin' and pitchin' a fit,_

_Get over it, get over it."_ Mal sings looking disdainful.

_"You say ya haven't been the same since ya had your little crash  
but you might feel better if they gave you some cash  
the more I think about it, ol' Billy was right  
let's kill all the lawyers- kill 'em tonight  
you don't wanna work you wanna live like a king  
but the big bad world doesn't owe you a thing_

_get over it  
get over it  
ya don't want to play then you might as well split  
get over it, get over it_

_It's like going to confession every time I hear you speak  
your makin' the most of your losin' streak  
some call it sick, but I call it weak  
yeah yeah yeah_" Jayne sings hefting his gun a little higher. He presses the barrel into the man's temple.

"_Yeah you drag it around like a ball an' chain  
you wallow in the guilt; you wallow in the pain  
you wave it like a flag, you wear it like a crown  
got your mind in the gutter, bringin' everybody down  
ya bitch about the present and blame it on the past  
I'd like to find your inner child an' kick it's little ass_

_get over it  
get over it  
all this bitchin' and moanin' and pitchin' a fit  
get over it, get over it"_

Zoë looks at Mal who nods.

The three of them sing the last chorus together as they shoot the four men.

"_Get over it  
get over it  
it's gotta stop some time so why don't you quit  
get over it, get over it  
get over it"_

Mal holsters his gun. "No one messes with my crew."

Black out.


	11. Best of My Love

"River sit still," Simon tries unsuccessfully to inject River with a soother as she wiggles. 

Kaylee comes into the Infirmary. "Can I help?"

"No," Simon says, a little more harshly than he intended it to be. "Helping my sister isn't like fixing a luh suh ship's engine."

"Really?" Kaylee's voice was prickly. "Nu bu gan kai ni de hwang chiang. You think what I do is luh suh?"

River starts to cry into his shoulder. "They wanted to hurt me…they hurt you…" she touches his bruised face.

"No mei mei…its ok, I'm ok." He looks back at Kaylee. "I really don't have time for this."

Kaylee sniffles. "Húndàn!" she snaps and runs out of the room.

* * *

The Best of My Love

Kaylee is lying in her bed on her side, pretending to be asleep but really wide-awake. There's a knock at her door.

"Kaylee? Look I'm really sorry…I didn't mean it…please talk to me…Kaylee…" Simon's voice comes drifting down. There's a long pause while Kaylee lies there in the dark lit only by her fairy lights and doesn't answer him.

"I'm sorry ok?" he says.

Then we hear his footsteps disappearing down the corridor as the music swells. Kaylee sits up, hugs her knees and starts to sing to herself.

"_Every night I'm lyin' in bed  
Holdin' you close in my dreams  
Thinkin' about all the things that we said  
And comin' apart at the seams  
We try to talk it over  
But the words come out too rough  
I know you were tryin'  
to give me the best of your love _

Beautiful faces and loud, empty places  
Look at the way that we live  
Wastin' our time on cheap talk and wine  
Left us so little to give.  
That same old crowd  
Was like a cold dark cloud  
That we could never rise above  
But here in my heart I give you the best of my love.  
Oh sweet darlin' you get the best of my love,

_Oh sweet darlin', you get the best of my love."_

She leans her head back against the wall.

"I'm goin' back in time  
And it's a sweet dream  
It was a quiet night  
And I would be all right  
If I could go on sleepin'.  
But every mornin'  
I wake up and worry  
What's gonna happen today  
You see it your way  
And I see it mine  
But we both see it slippin' away

You know we always had each other baby  
I guess that wasn't enough  
Oh, but here in my heart I give you the best of my love  
Oh, sweet darlin'  
You get the best of my love  
Oh, sweet darlin'  
You get the best of my love  
Every night and day,  
You get the best of my love  
Oh, sweet darlin' you get the best of my love  
Oh, sweet darlin' you get the best of my love."

Black out.

End Scene

* * *

Translation Notes

Luh suh_: crap_

Nu bu gan kai ni de hwang chiang - don't talk so nastily

_Húndàn_ asshole/bastard


	12. Lyin' Eyes

Lyin' Eyes

Inara montage, while Book sings over the top.

Inara is standing in a hallway of a large mansion on Persephone. A much older man takes her hand, and she smiles brightly at him. Her fake Companion smile. She is wearing a long black and gold dress and carrying a large bag. He has a whiff of Atherton Wing about him and he's not important enough for us to care what his name is.

"_City girls just seem to find out early  
How to open doors with just a smile  
A rich old man  
And she won't have to worry  
She'll dress up all in lace and go in style_"

Inara is sat in her room with tears streaming down her face. We see her writing a letter in neat elegant handwriting. The camera sweeps over her shoulder and we can read 'Dear Mal' written at the top.

"_Late at night a big old house gets lonely  
I guess ev'ry form of refuge has its price  
And it breaks her heart to think her love is  
Only given to a man with hands as cold as ice_

_So she tells him she must go out for the evening  
To comfort an old friend who's feelin' down  
But he knows where she's goin' as she's leavin'  
She is headed for the cheatin' side of town"_

We see her suitor staring out of the front door as she leaves, a long dark plain cloak over her fancy clothes, a sad look on his old face.

_"You can't hide your lyin' eyes  
And your smile is a thin disguise  
I thought by now you'd realize  
There ain't no way to hide your lyin eyes_

_On the other side of town a boy is waiting  
with fiery eyes and dreams no one could steal  
She drives on through the night anticipating  
'Cause he makes her feel the way she used to feel"_

A low down dive of a bar, and sat in the darkest corner is Mal, alone, nursing a drink and trying to look inconspicuous. Inara enters the bar, cloak covering anything fancy. Mal stands and she sees him and runs to him. She hugs him tightly. Mal looks a little surprised but hugs her back. Then she kisses him completely out of the blue.

Finally they sit down and start to talk. We can only see their mouths moving. Mal clearly is saying, "I'll come back for you."

"_She rushes to his arms,  
They fall together  
She whispers that it's only for awhile  
She swears that soon she'll be comin' back forever  
She pulls away and leaves him with a smile_

_You can't hid your lyin' eyes  
And your smile is a thin disguise  
I thought by now you'd realize  
There ain't now way to hide you lyin' eyes_"

Inara is alone in her room in her suitor's house. She's sat at her desk again, staring out of the window. She is dressed for bed, and is pouring herself a shot of whisky into a glass.

"_She gets up and pours herself a strong one  
And stares out at the stars up in the sky  
Another night, it's gonna be a long one_

_She draws the shade and hangs her head to cry  
She wonders how it ever got this crazy  
She thinks about a boy she knew in school  
Did she get tired or did she just get lazy?  
She's so far gone she feels just like a fool  
My, oh my, you sure know how to arrange things  
You set it up so well, so carefully  
Ain't it funny how your new life didn't change things  
You're still the same old girl you used to be_

_You can't hide your lyin eyes  
And your smile is a thin disguise  
I thought by now you'd realize  
There ain't no way to hide your lyin' eyes  
There ain't no way to hide your lyin' eyes  
Honey, you can't hide your lyin' eyes"_

Inara covers her face and we hear her whisper, "I want to go home."

Blackout.


	13. All Together Now

The Long Run

Inara walks back up Serenity's ramp and finds no one but Mal waiting for her. He smiles crookedly.

"_I used to hurry a lot, I used to worry a lot  
I used to stay out till the break of day  
Oh, that didn't get it,  
It was high time I quit it  
I just couldn't carry on that way  
Oh, I did some damage, I know it's true  
Didn't know I was so lonely, till I found you  
You can go the distance  
We'll find out in the long run  
(in the long run)  
We can handle some resistance  
If our love is a strong one (is a strong one_)"

Inara walks towards him and sings,

"_People talkin' about is  
they got nothin' else to do  
When it all comes down we will  
still come through  
In the long run  
Ooh, I want to tell you, it's a long run_"

Mal puts his hands awkwardly on her waist.

"_You know I don't understand why you don't  
treat yourself better  
do the crazy things that you do  
'Cause all the debutantes in Houston, baby,  
couldn't hold a candle to you"_

Inara sings her question. "_Did you do it for love?"_

_"Did you do it for money?"_

_" Did you do it for spite?"_

"_Did you think you had to, honey?"_ Mal raises his eyebrows at her. "_Who is gonna make it?  
We'll find out in the long run  
(in the long run)  
I know we can take it  
if our love is a strong one  
(is a strong one)"_

_"Well, we're scared, but we ain't shakin'  
Kinda bent, but we ain't breakin'  
in the long run"_

They sing together, all overly romantic aria, "_Ooh, I want to tell you, it's a long run  
in the long run  
in the long run,"_ before silencing themselves with a kiss.

* * *

One of These Nights

The entire crew are in the dining room.The intro music starts, and builds into the drum intro. Mal takes Inara's hands and sings to her. On the line 'Pretty mama,' he pulls her close to him with a naughty grin.

"_One of these nights  
One of these crazy old nights  
We're gonna find out  
Pretty mama  
What turns on your lights." _

"_The full moon is calling  
The fever is high  
And the wicked wind whispers  
And moans." _River lies smack bang in the centre of the dining table and sings to the ceiling, before sitting up gracefully, ballet like.

"_You got your demons  
You got desires  
Well, I got a few of my own" _Jayne leans on the table and gives her a wicked grin when Simon isn't looking.

Simon is in the kitchen with Kaylee. He looks over at her and sings, in romantic hero style, "_Oo, someone to be kind to in  
Between the dark and the light  
Oo, coming right behind you  
Swear I'm gonna find you  
One of these nights"_

Kaylee walks to the table carrying a bowl, brushing past Simon with a deliberate twitch of her hip into his._ "One of these dreams  
One of these lost and lonely dreams  
We're gonna find one  
One that really screams." _

"_I've been searching for the daughter of the devil himself," _sings Jayne, with another wicked smile.

"_I've been searching for an angel in white," _Simon sings at Kaylee's back with one of his shy smiles.

"_I've been waiting for a woman who's a little of both" _Mal smiles at Inara, who returns it.

All three sing together,_ "And I can feel her but she's nowhere in sight" _

"_Oo, loneliness will blind you  
In between the wrong and the right" _Book sings like it's a warning of the 'special' kind.

"_Oo, coming right behind you  
Swear I'm gonna find you  
One of these nights"_ Inara, River and Kaylee sing together.

There is a musical interval where everyone continues preparing dinner as normal.

_"One of these nights_

_Ooo In between the dark and the light  
Coming right behind you  
Swear I'm gonna find you  
Get 'ya baby one of these nights" _Wash kisses the back of Zoë's neck and she laughs._  
_

"_One of these nights" _Mal sings, in proper leading man style, all spread arms and big grin, at the head of the table.

_"Ooooo ooooo  
One of these nights  
I can feel it  
I can feel it  
One of these nights,"_ everyone else sings collectively, in perfect harmony.

_"Coming right behind you  
Swear I'm gonna find you now_" Mal grins at them all.

_"One of these nights. It gets so dark, so dark and cold at night. One of these crazy crazy nights. Oooooooo"_ They all finish in a big finale style a la a big dance number, then as if its never happened, they sit down and start to eat.


	14. Grand Finale

Hotel California

The famous guitar solo starts and the lights come up on the cargo bay, where our cast are assembled.

Mal is centre stage on the ground level, wearing his brown coat, gun and holster like normal. Inara is standing half way up the stairs to his right. Her stunning black dress and scarlet shawl fall around her body elegantly. Kaylee is sat on the catwalk her legs hanging, dressed in her overalls with the teddy bear, hair in pigtails, just up from Inara. River is stood at the bottom of the steps below Inara wearing her summer dress, baggy jumper and boots.

Book is at the bottom of the steps on the other side, as normal. Jayne is leaning on the railing on the catwalk. His t-shirt reads, "Once More With Feeling My Ass." Simon is half way up the stairs in his usual shirt and vest combo.

Wash, in a mad Hawaiian shirt and Zoë are standing behind Mal, backing him up like always.

Mal starts to sing, really going for it.

"_On a dark desert highway  
Cool wind in my hair  
Warm smell of colitis  
Rising up through the air  
Up ahead in the distance  
I saw a shimmering light  
My head grew heavy, and my sight grew dim  
I had to stop for the night"_

He looks up at Inara who smiles fondly at him.

"_There she stood in the doorway  
I heard the mission bell  
And I was thinking to myself  
This could be Heaven or this could be Hell  
Then she lit up a candle  
And she showed me the way  
There were voices down the corridor  
I thought I heard them say;" _

Kaylee, Zoë, Wash and Jayne sing the chorus with him. River providing the echoes (in brackets).

"_Welcome to the Hotel California,  
Such a lovely place  
(Such a lovely place)  
Such a lovely face.  
Plenty of room at the Hotel California  
Any time of year  
(Any time of year) _

_You can find it here."_

"_Her mind is Tiffany twisted  
She's got the Mercedes Benz  
She's got a lot of pretty, pretty boys  
That she calls friends," _Jayne manages to make the line about friends sound like the dirtiest thing in the world. Inara gives him a roll of her eyes. _  
_

"_How they dance in the courtyard  
Sweet summer sweat," _Kaylee sings sweetly, looking over at Simon.

"_Some dance to remember  
Some dance to forget," _Simon smiles back.

_  
_Book sings while looking to Mal.

_So I called up the Captain  
Please bring me my wine  
He said," _

"_We haven't had that spirit here since 1969," _Mal sings the reply.

River dances a lazy ballet step across the floor and sings dreamily,_ "And still those voices are calling from far away  
Wake you up in the middle of the night  
Just to hear them say;" _

All the men sing the chorus in harmony with the girls doing the echoes._ "Welcome to the Hotel California  
Such a lovely Place  
(Such a lovely Place)  
Such a lovely face.  
They're livin' it up at the Hotel California,  
What a nice surprise  
(What a nice surprise)  
Bring your alibis."  
_

Mal sings,_ "Mirrors on the ceiling  
The pink champagne on ice  
And she said;" _

"_We are all just prisoners here  
Of our own device" _Inara sings sweetly looking at him

"_And in the master's chambers  
They gathered for the feast" _Wash sings this, trying to steal centre-stage from Mal. Zoe pushes him back and sings,

"_They stab it with their steely knives  
But they just can't kill the beast." _

Mal reclaims his centre-stage, and sings dramatically, "_Last thing I remember  
I was running for the door  
I had to find the passage back to the place I was before  
Relax said the night man  
We are programmed to receive  
You can check out any time you like  
But you can never leave."_

Guitar finale and the cast take their bows. Wash and Zoë run forward first, hold hands and bow, Wash with the biggest cheesiest grin. Then Book comes and bows sedately. River comes forward and does a proper ballet bow, right down so she's practically sitting on the ground, all pointed toes. Jayne stomps forward, looking surly at all the theatrical refinement and does a small bow, very reluctantly. Kaylee and Simon come forward together. Simon bows elegantly, then gestures with his arm to Kaylee who does a very pretty attempt at a curtsy. Inara comes forward and curtsies gracefully. Mal runs forward, bringing her a bunch of roses, which she takes as well as a kiss. Mal bows deeply, his brown coat hanging round him.

The entire cast wave to the audience who are on their feet in rapturous applause.

Black out.


End file.
